Life as a cosmic adventurer…

7 01 2011

As a human being, I’m always searching for truth.  Truth to everything, as big and technical as social justice and as small and simple as why fish are attracted to worms.  I can honestly say that I’ve stumbled upon truths that have changed my life, but there’s one thing I think all us males have been trying to figure out, the opposite sex.  (I say opposite sex coming from my standpoint as a straight male, this is in no way gender specific and should apply to anyone seeking truth and seeking love toward a person or toward your preference for a partner.)

Media has been so diluted with shows and articles about how to pick up women or how to pleasure a woman that we forget about learning how to talk to women, how to understand women and how to understand a woman’s needs.  Next time you see a confident man, question his confidence.  Confidence in trying to get into your pants? Or confidence in himself as being a strong and genuine person. 

I’m always constantly questioning the women around me in regards to preference.  Preference in what they look for in a partner and what they understand as what criteria would best suit them as a partner.  I question them, not to figure out how I or my fellow males can change to better suit their interest.  It’s not about changing yourself to make someone fall in love with you.  It’s about rebelling against all social norms and being the person you were truly meant to be…. yourself.  I strive daily to be the person I was meant to be, treating others with respect, exactly how I would like to be treated.  Once you’ve figured out that social norms on appearance and style are not correct for all walks of life, you’re one step ahead of the game and in my opinion rebelling in your own way against what the majority of society would consider beautiful.

Back to preference, we all have our preference in what we look for in a partner.  The majority of women I asked as far as physical appearance goes want a taller partner, who knows how to carry themselves with confidence.  My next question was, “does physical weight or appearance matter to you?” .  The answer I got was pretty surprising.  Out of 10 women I asked, only 1 of them wanted a partner who was built with muscles.  I think this is a step forward in understanding that beauty doesn’t mean muscles and a six pack or big breasts and blonde hair.  Now if you’re questioning my findings… ask yourself… would you rather be with a beefcake who beats women and disrespects women only to make himself feel better? I also asked if a strong sense of style was important… and yes… it is.  What I found interesting is that preference of style wasn’t really important, or even being trendy… it was all about knowing how to carry themselves and being comfortable in their own skin.  Which makes sense to me, but in all honesty I wouldn’t date someone who carried themselves the wrong way while trying to portray a different person. 

So my dilemma in writing this blog was trying to write this in a way that wasn’t like a column.  I don’t want to give tips on how to date or how to meet that perfect person because in all honesty it varies between people and circumstances.  I’m trying to push everyone to do their own research, learn about yourself, learn about what you want in a partner and this cosmic adventure would be a more enjoyable ride.  Never settle for the next best thing, this only shows that you’ve given up.  My cosmic adventure is a constant ride, I can say that all the women I know are strong beautiful women and I learn from them everyday.  The topic of love for me is of cosmic proportions finding soulmates along the way, falling in love, falling out of love, crushing… and along the way learning about myself not only as a human being but a possible partner for a beautiful strong woman out there. 

So what truth have I learned from this particular cosmic adventure?  I learned that I still have a lot to learn… and that a lot of women I know are breaking away from dead end men.  When I say dead end men, I mean men who do everything to only benefit themselves.  I don’t believe that behind every good man there’s a good woman.  Why?  Because a woman should never be behind a man in a relationship.  Breaking free from Patriarchal norms and understanding that NO ONE is behind another person. 

Coming from a single person, you are all probably thinking that I’m all talk.  Think what you want to think… like I said.. this is an ongoing learning process… I may have stumbled upon a person I’m interested in.. and I might have not… what i’m looking for is harmony…. where all strings on the guitar played together play in tune… when one string goes out of tune… you work on it… to get it back to being intuned with the rest.  A great blog writer once wrote *ahem*…

 “I’m sick of seeing columns about love when in actuality love is a hidden instrument in all of us that plays music and harmonizes with a certain someone who’s playing the same tune. “

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Yes I’m a dork.. and I’m proud of it… and my cosmic adventure continues!

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2 responses

10 01 2011
jilllaxamana

who are these women you asked? you did not ask me? i say good looks ALL THE WAY!!!!!!

10 01 2011
shetpancit

I did ask you… i sent a text out… shet… maybe i need to re-learn how to use my iPhone! Good looks all the way??? WORD!!! And only the stylish of all… TapOut and Ed Hardy… how about True Religion jeans on guys? Sexy right?

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